iWant, iGet?
Wednesday, July 1, 2009
I think that this is highly possible. There was a time a couple of months ago where this was the case in my life. I got everything I wanted at the time but in looking back, these types of moments come with a price. In return for getting all I wanted, I suffered a huge setback. So while I think it is possible to get all you want, I think in the end it comes down to if you want it that bad that you're willing to suffer the consequences. If so, then you'll get it.
There have been many instances in which I think I really want something and feel incredibly disappointed when I don't get it. However, what I've found is that the absence of the thing that I had thought I wanted so bad opens the door for an opportunity or possibility that I'd never even imagined.
I doubt you wanted to be taller "with an inner exuberance that erupts through the skin and joins the energy that created the world" -- in fact, I doubt that "The Secret" fans or just about anybody has much idea what that really means.
Wanting that way means being willing to look completely fearlessly at what is, what you really want and why, and what getting what you want will involve.
Most of the time when people look that clearly, they find that they don't really want what they thought they wanted after all. But a couple times I have, and have decided to stick with my desire, and yup, I got it.
Not for FREE, but I got it.
I just see it as it's just my turn to have shitty luck, while people are getting whatever they need/want. Maybe I don't want it enough.
for me..not everything I wanted was exactly what I needed... Fate is a silly little thing...
I have gotten everything I have ever wanted when the desire came from my heart.
My EGO on the other hand has not always gotten what it wanted.
As of right now in my life, I believe I have gotten everthing I've ever needed. Maybe not what I want, since if I got that it probably would have been too much to handle.
@cjconnex It dawned on me after closing my response, one more tidbit of insight: no one is still living in our plane of existence who has realized EVERY desire, for life is nothing more than the sum of all experience; when there is NO THING left to be fulfilled, life as we know it ceases to serve any purpose. If death is one's destination, it seems prudent to choose the path with the greatest abundance of adventure and savour and relish every aspect of the journey. Always, always leave something on the table for another day.
The first thing you must recognize is that you never really desired to be taller; that's something that you most likely couldn't believe in with every fiber of your being. Being taller is your perception of a means to an end - you need to meditate on what is the ultimate objective which you can honestly accept as a possibility, then hold the vision in your mind as vividly as if it was already real.
Words like 'desperate' and 'want' should be abandoned since they vibrate with negative energy and usually result in unsatisfactory results.
If you make this simple paradigm shift (simple - not necessarily easy), you will be rewarded even beyond your wildest imagination as your perceptions evolve to ever greater expectations.
If I got everything I wanted, it would have destroyed me a long, long time ago.
Everyone could have everything they ever wanted - all they need to do is never want for anything they don't already have.
It's liberating, frankly, to not want for anything and to be content with whatever you have.
I can't help thinking that a world-wide recession is a lesson about greed. However is the lesson learned? As I listened to two personal banker acquaintances of mine talking about how they are giving loans and additional credit cards to people who can't pay them back (and laughing about it), I don't think anything has changed. One banker said with glee that in a few months none of his bank's customers will be paying less that 12.99% on credit cards. And those are the people with good credit!
i get the things i want when i'm determinated to get it, and i love to visualized myself getting those things.. i guess i really trust in that power.. i give something i receive something... it works for me
Hell no, I haven't gotten everything I wanted. But I genuflect to Rock God, Mick Jagger: you can't always get what you want, but if you try sometime, you get what you need.
Isn't it ironic that Oprah spent years getting everyone in America to read The Secret, attempting to turn us all into Beverly Hillbillies (regardless of our status, location, education, or salary level). We were all out there intently envisioning ourselves as Jed Clampett, Millionaire, black gold, Texas tea, Beverly, Hills, that is, swimmin' pools, movie stars...
And what did we end up with? "Great Depression: The Sequel." Why did this happen? Because God knows that the last thing any of us needs is more crap. We aren't what we own, kids... we aren't what we do for a living... we aren't the size of our McMansion, bra cup, nor SUV (or Prius, for that matter).
What ails us isn't a lack of commodities - it's a lack of moral conviction, self-knowledge, and a relationship with the God of our understanding. We prayed for never-ending sunshine and instead got rain - along with a big wake-up call to stop spending money and instead discover what is really important in our lives.
Talk about a true case of getting what we really need! All hail Mick - or God. Your pick.
Sometimes, even if you REALLY want something (or someone), you don't get it. I've learned that it may take years, but eventually you find out that not getting it was what was best for you in the long run. They say God does answer all prayers, but sometimes His answer is "No." My sister and I enjoy discussing that fact that we both are so grateful that God did not giving us those things (particularly certain people) that we thought we wanted so desperately.
people die and they don't come back. things sip away and no matter how much you want it, they still slip away.
it's sorry and insulting to think that a loved one would not have died if you wanted their life a little bit more.
if this were true than the world would be overpopulated and santa claus would be real.
the toughnesses and the sadnesses would be nil, and those are what make life special.
even though you can work your ass off to get nothing, that doesn't mean you still shouldn;t work your ass off, you know?
i haven't read "the secret" so i don't know what that secret is, but in "the Alchemist" paulo cuelho says that when you want something badly enough, the whole universe conspires to help you get it...great idea, though i don't think it's true. sometimes things don't work out, you don't get what you want...and when that happens i choose to believe that it is not in God's will and he has something much better planned for me...
I'll start off by saying I don't know anything about this "The Secret" stuff and it does sound a bit wacky. But i do believe wanting something "...with an inner exuberance that erupts through the skin and joins the energy that created the world.” is about right as far as getting things done in your life. but also that there are things that all the wanting in the world won't change, not unlike the getting taller (I do however think that that is kind of a half witted example of the kind of wanting we're talking about because logic would in any sensable person outweigh the wanting). but in the case of achievable(within the laws of nature i mean) goals, to want something so bad that its all you want and focusing everything you do on it, a person can do amazing things.
People on this board have pointed out that they haven't gotten everything they wanted in life, and no i haven't either. but i havent focused that hard on much of anything so could i have. But if I took that one thing and gave it my all, unless i faultered (and being human there is a very good chance i would) I do truely believe that failing would not be an option for me.
My first thought was the memory of pre-Christmas, I was about 13 years old. I knew where my mother hid my presents and looked through everything she had hidden there. On Christmas morning, I had to totally fake being excited and surprised since I had already seen absolutely everything she got me.
Now in later life, sometimes I feel like I have everything I don't want...I never expected to be divorced, relatively un-wealthy, some (minor but annoying) health problems...but then I remember I have never gone hungry, and I have never had to sleep on the street. I have my own home and my own little dented car and several best friends and people I could call anytime if I needed to. I have a job, frustrating though it may be at times, and a decent paycheck in these troubled times. I am supporting myself and not leaning on a husband or boyfriend; but at the same time I couldn't do any of it without a lot of help from my friends. My friends are everything.
So in some ways I have more than I ever thought I could.
I wanted bigger boobs and for my pectis excavatum to not be so horrible. I wanted it every single day and night of my life through my 20s. I burned with that desire and humiliation of my defect.
Now? I am ok with my body. It isn't like anyone else's and it won't ever look normal (c'mon my lungs are down where my stomach should be!) but I can dress around it and I now have other things that I want more--like for my daughter to be happy with HER body.
I think some of the concepts of the secret are true, and some are just whacky. You cannot control the universe... The only thing you can control is yourself and your own experience. Therefore, you will not always get your way because there are some things (a lot of things) that are beyond the scope of your control!
I haven't always gotten what I wanted. But then again, I've always prayed and then decided that God must have my back, so everything that ended up coming to me was always pretty fantastic and therefore I guess I must have always wanted the wrong things. At least it's easier to detach if I think about it that way...
@bookishgirlie One of the best responses I've read.
I don't think people ever really get everything they desperately want neither. I think that, just like with an economy, if people had everything, they would still want more. That's not a criticism on people, but rather the desire factor of humans. I think by nature, we desire. It's by choice, or nurture, that we can come to just accept our lives just as Sturgis has.
I have never gotten everything I desperately wanted. I chalk it up to 'reality'.
When I was a kid, my mom never let me ride the 25 cent mechanical horse outside the grocery store. I asked her recently why not and she said "I don't know. I guess I was in a hurry." She also apologized, saying she didn't realize it meant that much to me. Looking back, I think that is one of the reasons I'm ok with not getting everything I want. My life is just fine never having had a ride on the 25 cent horse.
If everyone got everything that they wanted, then our lives would lose a lot of their purpose.
No one in the world ever gets what they want and that is beautiful
Everybody dies frustrated and sad and that is beautiful
-They Might Be Giants
It was a girl. needless to say, no i did not get what i wanted. Then i repeated the process like 4 or 5 more times (i've stopped counting). Somewhere near the beginning i realized the key to it all: I want for me whatever it is God wants for me. After that, i just try to figure it out and let everything else come when it does.
The things I want are in the future. I push for them every day. Will I get them? I guess we'll see.
Definitely not. Not even when I think I had gotten everything I could hope to get, it's just not possible. I don't mean that in a "I'm just too materialistic and need stuff all the time," I'm just saying on a general physical, spiritual, and emotional- level, I haven't really gotten everything I want. That doesn't keep me from trying, though.
No way have I gotten everything I've wanted. Sometimes i blame myself, sometimes others, and sometimes God. When I look at other people who have what i want, I cant help but think, "Why not me?" but then reality sets in...obviously there's a reason "why not me" and so I'd be content in figuring that out...who knows, my own blessings may be more what i need than I think!! Maybe what i want isnt what I SHOULD be wanting.
See, my problem is, people often are lumped into Haves, and Have-Nots. And when people do this, it's really commonly said that the Have-Nots just don't want things badly enough. I don't believe this is true at all though...often the Haves can easily run away with the desires of the Have-Nots, and thusly, no matter how badly they want it and how hard they work to achieve it. How many times has there been a promotion up for your job, and you see some slob who barely does any work, with the worst attitude towards the job and his coworkers end up with the promotion? You can work work and work, and have the boss KNOW of your desire, but if the slob is the district manager's kid, you can kiss that promotion goodbye, regardless of your manager's desire to give you the deserved position.
@laurenmuir Yes, I agree that we have to accept that sometimes what we want is NOT what we need. Sometimes the answer is "NO".
I hope nobody said they got everything they ever wanted. Shit, I barely get anything I need. I blame it one lots of things, money, time, other people. There are things I've wanted so badly, that I've worked so hard for, and seen other people get it. Those are the people that get everything they want anyway. I'll just find something new to try for. It's the motivation that's hard to come by.
I don't think I have. Right now, I have the love of my life, but he lives in another country. I don't think you can really say for a lot of things "the cause is this." definitively, because the road to getting "EVERYTHING" one wants, is really a chain reaction with a multitude of factors, actions and results. That being said, any one thing could derail this, but at the same time, it's never really one thing, is it? When someone is whining about their life, it's always a myriad of things. "Blah blah, I lost my job, my wife left me for a woman in Mexico, my dog died and my Mum has cancer and..." It goes on and on.
So I suppose what I'm saying is, while one can place the blame on one factor (lack of desire, circumstances of birth/location/gender, human inadequacies etc), I think it's an inaccurate and illogical thing to do. When it comes to my foremost desire (ie: getting to New Zealand to be with said love), I'm looking at things in steps. It's been five years so far, and while agonizingly painful to wait, it's made it easier to weather the difficult circumstances that have been thrown my way (hours cut at work, various deaths, home issues, family issues on both sides, etc etc etc).
As for desire, or lack thereof, I know a LOT of people who have desired something so much they've actually driven the possibility of success AWAY. I mean, how many times did you absolutely beg the CRAP out of your parents for the "ONE TOY EVERY KID WILL BE GETTING/HAS" for christmas? In my experience, at least 50% of the time that happened, my mum got so annoyed, she purposely avoided buying that one thing just because I wouldn't shut up about it. On the reverse side, one really can desire something terribly bad, do all within their power to obtain it, but not be able to control all the factors involved in achieving it. So I don't believe that desire as a single factor can be singled out as the one thing that impedes progress with goals.
I want someone to love me for who I am in terms of a serious relationship. I don't have that right now and I chalk it up to not being the right time. I'm still pursuing my degrees in education and love focusing on my career instead of worrying about settling down. It's still too early.
When I have had a deep enough desire for something I will get it. My desire must be deep enough that if the 'want' required effort to attain, I would be willing to give the required effort to have it. The required element is believing in myself and sticking to that desire. Everyday new wants fly in and out of my head but I cannot just 'want' the possession, acclaim, love etc., I have to deeply desire it. My mind, soul and body have to be completely in agreement. I must get on the same frequency and become my desire to attain my desire. Quantum physics has proven that at the deepest level of all matter there is an energy where all is one. We must become to attain.
When I haven't gotten something I wanted, I chalked it up to me not being meant to have it, at least not at the time I wanted it. There have been a few times where I've gotten something I wanted a long time after I've wanted it and not wanted it.
i think it would be awful if we got everything we want.
1. we are humans so naturally some of the things that we want are wrong. we want to cheat, we want to steal, we want to cause bodily harm, and we want to see others hurt. you may disagree and say "no i don't" but you know what like i said your human and we're born as sinners. your lying right now if you say you've never wanted anything wrong
2. how bratty would that make us as a society. you see parents who give their kids everything they want. it gives you a sense of entitlement. thats ugly
3. who are you to say that what you want is what you need. what if i really really want this job position and i can hear God telling me no but i tell him to shut it because "i know what I want" obviously my life would be made a living hell if i took the job when He told me not to...not really a life i wanna live. Sometimes i have to force myself to want what He wants but i'll admit i don't all the time...and i always end up regretting it.
there are so many reasons to be thankful we're not spoiled.
*note* granted i understand we're talking about working for everything that we want and not just taking handouts but my opinion stands all the same. you can look at everyone of my reasons and see why it would be stupid to work so hard for something that just isn't ment to be.
There really just one thing I want—a realistic thing—that I don't think I'll ever be able to get due to... "familial pressures". I'll spare you the details for fear of coming across as an "attention whore", as it were, and because they're not terribly important for conveying the point I'm trying to make. Let's just say it's a little more complicated than wanting to be taller.
Regardless, wanting something you can never really have, especially something that's realistic but ~just~ out of reach, is one of the most soul draining things I've ever experienced. I'm a person of few "desperate" desires, so I suppose it's rather unfortunate that the only things I really want are things I can't really have.
1) i have all i want because i have the one thing which fills me completely, forever.
b) "...whether the world or life or death or things present or things to come; all things belong to you, and you belong to christ; and christ belongs to God."
Dang, am I the only person who, upon getting all I want , would feel guilty for not wanting something else? I try to want what I have and leave complete satisfaction up to eternity. I would be tormented otherwise.
Yes. I believe that Sheilah Graham is correct in her assertion that if you want something badly you get it. I believe that the first thing you need to do is to know exactly what it is that you want. Then you need to have determination to go and get it. Then you need to have faith and confidence that the thing you want will come to you. Finally, you must take massive action, you must act as though you already have it. I can tell you that it has worked for me.
oddly, i've always thought that the main reason i don't get what i desperately want, is because i want it so much, and somehow i can't think clearly how to get it.
It would be insane if everyone could get what they want
@Morningstr313 The Secret addresses and is in alignment with what you said about getting something far better. It says that God/The Universe tends to deliver well above our expectations because it has in store for us possibilities greater than we can imagine.
I believe The Secret pretty explicitly states that want alone is not enough. There's a process involved that requires one to be an active participant in manifesting things in their lives. Only when the want is clearly defined, requested, a sincere belief in receiving and gratitude is expressed for it will the universe present the opportunities to put you on the path to receiving what you want. But we have to be open to receiving and not let doubt and self-defeating thoughts change our mindset, and thereby our actions, get in the way.
I would be terrified to get anything and everything I want. I often want things that are bad for me. Everyone does. As far as the things I desperately want in life, sometimes I don't get what I THINK I want, but what I get is far, far better. Thank God the person in charge knows better than me! Some things I'm still working toward. I do agree that you can't just sit around wanting stuff. You have to work toward goals to get the things you desire. People can't be healthy without exercise and a proper diet; people can't be rock stars without practicing. You just can't.
I chalk it up to allowing fear, laziness, lack of determination keep me from going after what I want. I estimate that 90% of the time these are the reasons I don't get what I want. I agree with rachelstarlive, things don't just land in your lap without action. You have to do something to bring them into reality; otherwise, wants and desires are just thoughts that never come to fruition. And if you want something desperately, it's probably not easy to attain and that means it probably involves considerable effort to get it.
I don't think that you can get anything you want just by wanting it desperately. I am curious to know if The Secret has worked for anyone?
Ha! I grew up in a house of want... my fam was pretty poor compared to everyone else it seemed. As I grew up I found out that it wasn't that we were "poor" it was that we were living with in our means where as everyone else's fam had crazy credit card debt and what not.
I think that if you really really want something then you will do whatever you have to to get it... but just wanting it badly? no things don't poof out of thin air.
I think a lot of people end up feeling they have everything they want for their sanity's sake. It's so easy to pretend you didn't want something as badly as you may have at one time.
As for me, I didn't always get everything I wanted, but I always kind of felt that way because I think a) I tried to succeed in a few areas, or through a number of different ways and ended up being successful through one of them. I think you can really end up doing what you love doing and being around people you love, but it may not be in the exact form you had envisioned it. I suppose this is also a way of getting around not having everything you want--wanting things you end up having--but I guess without these little contingencies it would be a pretty easy answer: When it comes to matters of extreme love, money, and fame, only a very small number of people get it. Maybe the idea behind telling people they can have everything they've wanted is so that they will continue being motivated, productive members of society. If we knew FOR SURE our dreams were never going to come true, what would drag us out of bed?
I'm fighting everyday the ego wars, trying to love what i have and not have what i love.
Dear Universe: protect me from what i want.
DISCUSSION TOOLSET
i don't think anyone's ever got EVERYTHING they wanted, but what would be the point of life if you did? you'd have nothing to work toward or a goals....i'd prefer to always have dreams rather than have everything i wanted